Today I took Seth and Bo on the little ferry boat across to Ernakulam, the main part of the city of Kochi. It's a 45 minute ride passing all sorts of types of boats. Today was particularly interesting because the Queen Mary 2 (the world's largest ocean liner) was in dock. Seth was seriously impressed and gave a big 'WOW!' which drew even more attention to us.
Our destination was the Childrens Park right next to the jetty. It looked like a couple of hundred metres on the map, so a nice and easy afternoon outing. So naive. The tiny, potholed pavement was overcrowded with market sellers and crowds of people, and the occasional tree with big knobbly roots shooting out through the cracks in the paving stones. Not pushchair or toddler friendly at all. So I had no choice but Seth in the sling and to walk in the road. Cue large group of people crowded round me as I attempt to lift my 15kilo boy onto my back. Sideshow over, I worked my way down the hectic road with buses and cars charging by and rickshaws and bicycles almost catching my heels.
So I was relieved to arrive safely at the park.
What a place! It was all very 1950s, including the ticket. I was the only person in the park that vaguely resembled the post-war British looking woman with her two white children. Seth looked pretty confused for the hour or so we were there, but I think enjoyed some familar activities like slides and see-saws. I, on the otherhand, was a nervous wreck for the entire time. A poster advertising a prize for bravery for children made me chuckle - is it given to every child who survives this place?
For the record, here are 10 ways for children to seriously harm themselves at the childrens park in Ernakulam:
1. Be knocked over by other kids driving metal pedal cars, in a manner that pretty much resembles the road just outside.
2. Be deafened by the Indian pop music blaring out on gigantic speakers right next to the one piece of grassed area.
3. Scald their feet on the burning hot sand in the under 5s area where no shoes are allowed.
4. Be terrorized by the interesting choice of idols in the middle of the play area.
5. Be severely sunburnt because only one roundabout and the idols have shade.
6. Get shaken baby syndrome from a ride on the moving aeroplane for under 3s that vibrates manickly and made Seth scream with fright.
7. Fall off the high bridge with completely open stairs and sides.
8. Fly down the elephant trunk slide at such a speed due to the stupidly steep gradient that you fly off the end flat on your face.
But saying that, Seth survived, and quite enjoyed himself, so I expect we will go back. After that we went to India's answer to KFC for fishfingers and to play in their (much safer) play area. Not where I'd choose to hang out on a Sunday afternoon, but the boys couldn't have been happier.
